My SHINY Nickels

Live Smart. Save Money. Retire Early.

The Graham Cracker Effect

By:

graham-crackersIf you’re anything like me, the more you have your grubby hands all over your money, the more likely that money will find it’s way to Amazon.com or BestBuy or Target.  So the goal should be to stop “touching” it so darn much, and activate a sort of financial cruise control, if you will.

When we started really putting our savings into overdrive (yes, I’m trying to use as many car metaphors as I can in this post), we started out with a whole lot of manual transferring and moving (there I go again).  Payday would come and I would see that big juicy number in our account.  But in the back of my mind, I knew that number was about to get much smaller.  I still had to transfer to all of our different investment accounts.

No matter how motivated you are to put money away, there’s still something psychologically unnerving about entering a large dollar amount and then pressing “TRANSFER”.  In the early debt-free days, as we learned how to start saving our money, I fully admit it wasn’t always easy pressing that “TRANSFER” button.

“Yowzers, that’s a chunk of money.  I could have totally purchased two flights to Hawaii with that money.  Or a new convertible top for my car.  Or built a new patio cover for the back porch.”  Or I could…Or I could…Hrmph.

That’s when I finally realized that I needed to get everything AUTOMATED.  A hands-free, no-touch, never-saw-it-in-the-first-place kind of setup.  So that’s what we did.  And yes, it was a little bit scary.  We decided to start by directing a portion of our paychecks towards maxing out our 401k ($17,500 x 2) and Roth IRA ($5,500 x 2) contributions, and see how that felt.  But with just that first step, we knew it meant we were putting away $46,000 a year that we previously weren’t saving, so we felt pretty bad@$$ with just that alone.  We got everything set up, filled out various HR forms online and pressed “SUBMIT”.

Then…I started worrying.

“Are we going too far, too fast?”

“Are we going to feel broke all the time?”

But that first pay period passed, and as unbelievable as it sounds, we really didn’t miss it.  Yes, our final net pay was much lower. Of course. But like with many other things, you work with what you’ve got, you spend what you have.  In fact, I like to call it the graham cracker effect*.

 

* Mr.Nickels l-o-v-e-s him some graham crackers.  I used to buy a box of graham crackers on random occasion, and he would eat them at a rather normal pace.  The box would be gone in about a week and a half.  Then we started shopping at Costco. I found the exact same graham crackers in a 4-box package, for slightly less money than I was spending on the singles I was buying at our local grocery store.  So I plopped them in my cart.  Now, standard logic would tell you that if 1 box lasted approximately 1.5 weeks, then 4 boxes should last roughly 6 weeks.  But that’s not what happened.

grahamlarge

This is two weeks worth of graham crackers at our house…ok, I’m exaggerating. A little.

 

Apparently, the consumption rate of graham crackers increases in direct proportion to their current availability in the pantry.  In other words, the more we have, the more he eats.  We ran out of ALL 4 boxes of graham crackers in just 3 weeks.

 

My point is that many of us have a tendency to spend what we have, whether it’s a big amount or a small amount.  If you give yourself $500 to spend for the month, you’ll find a way to spend it.  If you give yourself $1,000 to spend, you’d find a way to spend that in a month as well.  So it’s time to push yourself.  If you currently don’t contribute to a 401k/403b/457/TSP/IRA, start.  Begin with a percentage you think you can handle, or if you get a company match on your 401k (my company matches the first 6%, for example), that should be your minimum.  Then sit back and see if you miss it.  I can almost guarantee you won’t.

Moving from Hoarder to Hustler

By:

hoardtohustleFirst of all, no, that’s not a picture of my garage.

Have you seen the show “Hoarders” on A&E? (Or some variation of it?)  That show is like a car accident. A part of me wants to watch because I’m fascinated by the levels of filth people will live in, but yet I want to turn away because it’s so disturbing. (Note: I realize that “Hoarders” is mindless reality television, but cut me some slack. At least I don’t watch that “Honey Boo Boo” show.)

After reading a fellow blogger post about her decision to de-clutter her life, I felt the need to do the same. Is my house filled with all kinds of junk? No. But my garage certainly has a few boxes that I know contain items worth something.  Things that I just haven’t taken the time to rightfully part with.

You know how you clean out a closet, and there’s 3 piles? Keep, donate, and sell? Well, the “keep” is pretty self-explanatory, the “donate” goes out to the street when I get one of those card-thingys in the mail, and then there’s that “sell” pile. That stupid “sell” pile ends up in a box and put on a shelf in the garage, next to all the other boxes marked “SELL”.  So it’s come to my attention that I’m in a bit of denial. As if I’ll walk out there someday and find that the Junk Fairy has taken it all away and left me a $50 dollar bill. Hrmph.

So when you multiply that box by several closets/rooms worth of de-cluttering efforts over the years, I’m left with an entire estate sale sitting in my garage.  (Ok, that’s an exaggeration. We have lots of boxes, but we can still park both vehicles in there. We’re not THAT bad.)

So a few Saturdays ago I decided it was find-out-what-the-heck-I-have-in-these-boxes day.  I was almost appalled at the items I had sitting out there just chillaxin’.  A few-years-old Acer netbook.  A relatively new 20″ Sony flatscreen television with a built-in DVD player.  Various audio/video cords and cables, unopened in their original packaging.  Pottery Barn decor.  All of this stuff could easily be sold.  SO WHY THE HECK AM I LETTING IT SIT IN MY GARAGE???

Sorry, but I need a moment to punch myself in the face.  *** THWACK ***

I’m back. Anyway…after finding those initial “easy sells”, I started looking harder at the stuff I had put in the “not-worth-anything” pile. Maybe I need to think a little more before I give up on the rest of this stuff.  So I went on eBay.  Does anybody still want the 10th Anniversary Edition of the PC game Myst?  A quick search of “sold” listings…and it turns out…YES!  They do!  And they’ll actually give me money to take it off my hands!

Suddenly even the pile of “junk” that I had deemed worthless just moments before, was going up in value before my eyes.  I quickly found an empty box and started selecting the first items that would be up for sale.

ebaybox

You’ve got to start somewhere. These little beauties will be the first to go.

The next day I spent about 30 minutes getting my first three items in ready-to-sell condition, and posting them up for auction on eBay.  I listed the Acer Netbook, a pair of wood Pottery Barn candleholders and a Pottery Barn frame.  You can call me Captain Progress.  I was gettin ‘er done.

So I listed them…and…THEY ALL SOLD.  After shipping costs, I made $93.92.  Almost $100 just from 3 items I previously had sitting in my garage collecting dust.  And ya wanna know where that sweet little pile of cash is going?  Straight to our investment account.

Make money? Win.  Clean out my garage?  Win.  And that’s what we call a win-win situation, folks.  From hoarder to hustler.  Why didn’t I do this earlier?

Breaking the Million-Dollar Car Habit

By:

The BMW Z4. 2 years ago, we came dangerously close to buying this.

I used to have a car payment. Several different ones over the course of my life, in fact. Now that I think about it, I had a monthly car payment of some sort for 13 years non-stop, beginning when I was 20.  I went from a Honda…to a Mazda…then a Toyota…then another Honda…then a Ford…then another Mazda…and finally a Mercedes.

And until we paid off the Mercedes a few years ago, I had never driven a car that was debt-free.  EVER.  It had never occurred to me to just keep the same car.

mercedes

June 2009 — The day we bought the Mercedes. I’m not sure what I was attempting to do with my leg here, but I guess that’s what I thought people did when they posed with their new car. Instead, I look like I’m missing a leg and that my torso is super-glued to the door frame. Fail.

Cars have their appeal, I get that.  They once appealed to me enough to hand over hundreds of dollars a month for the simple task of moving my behind from Point “A” to Point “B”.  But to what end? We all know what happens. It’s the law of diminishing returns. The first few months in a new (or new-to-you) car feel exhilarating.  The pungent aroma of fresh pleather/leather/plastic/vinyl fills our nostrils, causing the pleasure sensors in our brains to light up like the 4th of July.  (That smell is so desirable, you can actually buy one of those little dangly air fresheners in the scent “New Car Smell”. Wow.)

newcarscent

You didn’t think I was joking, did you?

Anyway, as the months and years pass…you trade it in…accepting less than it’s market value just to “get ‘er done”…buy another hunk of steel and rubber to move yourself around…the months and years pass…are you sensing a pattern here?  Ok, good.  I thought it was just me.

I used to be that person.  I was stuck in the cycle until I figured out that if I want to reach my financial goals, I need my money working FOR me, not AGAINST me.  So I did a rough calculation.  How much money did I throw away on car payments during those 13 years?  (Do I really want to know? No.   But for the sake of illustration? Yes.)

13 Years  x  $400 average monthly payment = $62,400

Oh, how that number pains me.  Really, it does.

But if you take into consideration the opportunity cost of throwing that money away, the numbers get worse.  So let’s continue the self-deprecating fun with numbers, shall we?

If I had saved that same $400 a month for the first 2 years (25 months), I would have had $10,000 to buy a well-made, fuel-efficient, no-one-would-laugh-at-me car, with CASH.  That car would be driven (and maintained!) for at least 10…15…maybe even 20 years.  (Stay with me, we’re not done yet.)

So I now have my $10,000 car, paid for with cash, but I continue to save that same $400 I would normally be paying in car payments, for the remaining 11 years. Do you know how much I would have at the end of the same 13 years?  If I had invested that additional money, with an average 9% return, I would have a PAID-FOR car AND…

$89,672.62

Seriously!  The math doesn’t lie.  But this is so depressingly fun, let’s take it one step further.

Sadly, since many people consider a car payment as “part of life” and have one (or more) for much of their working lives, let’s say that I continued to save that $400 each month, as if I had a car payment, for a full 35 years. Do you realize how much I would have?…at the age of 57?

$1,176,736.85

AHHHHHHHH!!!   Let’s go bang our heads against a wall, because that, my friends, is what we miss out on when we decide to jump in to the buy/trade-in/buy/trade-in/buy cycle.

Can you imagine your life without a car payment? What would that mean to your finances?

Do the math.  If you were investing your car payment(s) instead of sending it to the CEO of Ford Motors every month, what would you have in 5…10…20…35 years?  Seriously, do it.  Find a simple savings calculator online, like this one at Bankrate.com, and put in your monthly car payment(s) as the monthly deposit.  Set the Annual Interest at 9%, and play with the number of years.  WARNING: The results may depress and/or inspire you.

So get off the merry-go-round already.  Sell your car, pay off your car, whatever you have to do to get rid of those ridiculously dumb car payments.

Or….don’t.

But be sure to take a good l-o-o-o-o-o-o-n-g whiff of that new car scent every few years…you’ll need it to drown out the smell of your million dollars going up in flames.

Guest Post by Mr. Nickels: If Only Marty McFly Had a 401k

By:

back-to-the-future

[Every once in a while, Mr. Nickels likes to take over the keyboard. Enjoy!]

— Mrs. Nickels

 

When I first began what would become a 20-year career in the photofinishing industry, I remember looking at compounding interest charts.  The charts came with the literature about contributing to the company retirement plan. I specifically remember looking at a chart very similar to the one below.  The concept of compounding interest was intriguing. “Ben” only invests a total of $16,000 between the ages of 19 and 26. He ends his career with $2.3 Million. Arthur doesn’t start investing until he is 27, and invests a total of $78,000 until his retirement at age 65. He ends his career with $1.5 Million.

Recap?  Ben invests $62,000 less, but ends his career with $756,830 more than Arthur.  All because Ben started early.  Amazing.

benarthur

 

I did end up contributing to my 401k, but it was more out of obligation, than desire. I didn’t act on this new information with passion. Why not? I’m not really sure.  Looking back, I’m fairly sure that if I had made a similar chart using my own numbers…what I could have saved, what interest rates I could have realistically expected, what I needed to retire…I may have acted. Would my life be different? I don’t know.

Me at the beginning of my career, circa 1986

Do I have regrets? Not at all!  I am where I need to be. I’m a sci-fi nerd and have seen enough time travel episodes to know that a small change in my past can drastically change my future (sorry, off topic).

I admit I have made some HUGE financial mistakes in my past. I have also made some very smart moves. It all led to where I am right now. This post is about finding the motivation to change your future. But, just like history class, we can often look to our past for clues. So, what motivates me? What is it in me that makes me give up so much now to invest for a better future? I began to think of some goals I accomplished in the past. What motivated me to reach these goals?

 

The Marathon

It’s a Sunday afternoon in early December, 2011. The family and I are at my favorite Mexican restaurant, enjoying a few tacos. Out the window, we watch as the back-of-the-pack stragglers running the California International Marathon start to pass by.  The wheels in my head started spinning…I want to do that!  Back in high school, I hated running.  So why did I want to run a marathon? I think it was just the fact that not many people can run 26.2 miles.

When I first started running, I couldn’t run half a mile without stopping. I kept at it. Within a week or so, I finally ran a full mile non-stop. Pure joy! My first goal was accomplished. Soon, I was running three miles, three days a week. By that summer I was ready to start training for the marathon coming in December. I went online and found a conservative training plan and started the 18 weeks of progressively longer runs in preparation to run 26 miles + 385 yards.

That December morning in 2012 finally came, and in the middle of one of the worst storms of the year.  The rain was blowing sideways as I exited the shuttle bus. What am I thinking? The gun went off and I crossed the starting line. In the pouring rain, my emotions got the best of me at the half mile marker.

I was actually running a marathon.

Me, the one that hated running, was running with 8,000 other people toward the finish line 26 miles away. It was a once-in-a-lifetime feeling. At the halfway point, I was feeling really good. My legs felt great, I was breathing steady, and I was confident I would finish strong. Then the bolt of pain hit me. I had pulled a quad muscle at mile 17. But I was still going to finish! I limped, walked and jogged my way to the finish line. It took everything in me to get there, but I reached my goal. The rain was gone and the sun was shining by the time I finished 5 1/2 hours later.

What was my motivation?

marathon

 

 

Climbing Half Dome

I’ve been to the top of Half Dome in Yosemite three times, but I will never forget that first trip. It’s about 7 1/4 miles of uphill hiking to the base of the dreaded cables that lead to the summit. There were people standing at the base, refusing to climb those cables. I admit, they are a little overwhelming and daunting to look at. From the bottom it looks like a vertical death trap. But after all the energy it took to get that far, there was no way I wasn’t going to finish.

ry=400

The dreaded cables at Half Dome in Yosemite

I put on my gloves, grabbed the cables and started the climb. About every four feet there are two-by-fours across the path so you can rest. As it got steeper, I remember thinking, “just one step at a time…stay safe for my kids…I can’t die here.” So with each vertical step, I said the names of my daughters….. Kelly…… Lindsay……Kelly…….Lindsay, all the way to the top. It seemed like hours to get there. Fifty to seventy-five people caterpillaring their way up, stopping every four feet to rest for a few minutes. Finally, I was there and the views were spectacular. Worth all the effort and fear to get there.

What was my motivation?

halfdome

My first trip to the top of Half Dome. This is one of my favorite pictures.

Side note: I would love to climb Mt. Everest, but my wife assures me I will be a single man upon my return.  [Mrs. Nickels’ Editorial Comment:  For the record, he wouldn’t be a single man when he came home.  My fear is that I’d be a single woman when he DIDN’T come home. So there.]

 

So why am I only now, at this stage of my life, using my money wisely? What changed in my mind?

The only difference between then and now is a GOAL, a PLAN, and a DEEP DESIRE to reach that goal. The biggest motivator for me was seeing on paper a plan to save with an end date just seven years from now. I believe if I’d had that information in my early 20’s I would have had the motivation to retire that much sooner. But I’ll never really know. However, now I know what we want and what it’s going to take to get us there. Everyone is motivated in different ways. Look at other parts of your life where you have succeeded in completing a goal. What was your motivation? In the two stories above, I had a goal in my head, a desire to accomplish that goal, and a clear, no questions asked, plan to get there.

So what motivates you?  Find your motivation and use it to change your life for the better.

Reader Stories: RELIEF is spelled E-M-E-R-G-E-N-C-Y F-U-N-D

By:

emerfundI got a text from a friend the other day.  Her and I have bonded over all matters financial, and she is recently back from vacation.  Her text said “I love our emergency fund”

Hmmmm….[interest has officially been peaked at this point]

She went on to tell me that her husband had an “oops” with the garage door, and another “oops” in the rental car while they were on vacation. Poor guy, these two things were practically back-to-back.  She said her husband was feeling really guilty about the money it was going to cost to fix those things.  But what she said next is what really struck me.  “I wasn’t mad at him at all for either one.  What a relief.  Resentment avoided because of a simple emergency fund.”

It got me thinking.  How many times do people argue with their spouse/significant other because of an unexpected expense?  You hear about it all the time.  Money is by and large the #1 issue couples fight about.  When something unexpected happens, is the argument really about the expense itself, or does it really stem from the stress over not having money to pay for it?

Mr Nickels and I have very few arguments, but when I think back to the few that we had prior to our financial awakening, most were indeed about unexpected expenses.  Several years ago we had an issue that caused our auto insurance to increase by nearly $100 per month.  We (thought) we didn’t have a dime to spare at the time (in reality we were just spending all our dimes on housing and cars), and now we had to come up with another $100 in our monthly budget.  I got upset, my husband became irritable, and next thing we knew we were in a heated argument over…the auto insurance.  Our precarious financial situation was causing discord in our relationship.  It wasn’t about why the auto insurance increased, it was that we didn’t have the money to pay for it. Eventually we calmed down enough to look at the situation logically, and without emotion.  But the whole argument could have been avoided.

If that same scenario were to occur today, sure it would be irritating, but it wouldn’t throw us into an emotional tailspin like it did a few years ago.

Going back again to my friend who sent me the text, she’s still in her early 20’s, but financially mature beyond her years.  She seems to understand my “Live Smart, Save Money, Retire Early” philosophy.  I’ll call her my Nickel from another Pickle.  (Ok…here’s where I thought I would be clever and come up with a rhyme.  That was the first thing that came out, but as I started typing, it became apparent how awkward that sounds.)  *crickets*

Getting to my point, she’s figured things out that some people can take a lifetime, if ever, to understand.  Things happen.  People make mistakes.  But knowing they could cover those expenses (and without going into debt!) kept her from feeling resentful or frustrated at her husband.  In fact, what she described was RELIEF.

An emergency fund is more than just unused cash sitting in an account, taunting you.  It’s a safety net.  A psychological security blanket.  For those of us that have them, it helps us sleep better at night and keeps financial harmony in our relationships.  Emergency Fund = Less Fighting Over Money

Do you have an emergency fund?  If you don’t, that’s the first thing you should do when you finish reading this.  Sit down and figure out how you can get one started.  You may have to get ninja-like on your finances to do it, but $1,000 should be the absolute minimum.  Then, if you’ve got debt (yes, that includes auto loans), pay that off next.  Then aim for a fully funded emergency account.  I suggest $5,000, which should cover most major catastrophes that come your way.

It’s hard to save money.  I know that.  But by saving even just a little bit, consistently, you’ll soon have a sweet little pile of cash.  And unexpected expenses really aren’t unexpected at all.  It’s not IF something will happen, but WHEN.  That little emergency fund could save you some tears, some stress and possibly even…your relationship.

How To Buy Plants for $1…and a Backyard Update!

By:

It’s been a backyard-landscaping frenzy the last week or so at the Nickels house, and I’ve never been so excited to have dog poop in the tread of my sneakers or bat dung under my fingernails.  Oh, you didn’t know that mulch has ‘bat guano’ as a component? Me either.

(Sidebar…What I really want to know is how much poop can a bat possibly make, and how do they get it?  I picture these large bat farms with a “professional guano harvester” coming through every so often. Now THAT’S a job.  Just when I think I know everything.  Hrmph.)

Since I recently posted about our DIY backyard deck, which was finished, ahem, MONTHS ago, I suddenly had this desire to jump-start the next phase…plants.  That’s one of the benefits of blogging.  When you realize that everyone can see your lonely (but very cool) backyard deck, bordered by some sad empty planters, it makes you want to fix it.  A sort of virtual accountability, I suppose.

This is where we last left off…

deckfinished

And if I’ve learned anything about getting things done, you gotta strike while the iron’s hot.   And right now, the iron is white-hot.  Smoking.  Glowing, even.

So I decided to buy and plant at least one new plant in our backyard, per day, for 7 days straight, and do it as CHEAPLY AS POSSIBLE.

This began last Saturday, May 3rd.  So I headed to Lowe’s, my favorite home improvement store.  See how gorgeous the weather was that day?  It was 75 degrees with a slight breeze.  Perfection.

lowes

I strolled into the garden department, and headed towards the back.  Discount carts.  Now we’re talking.

salerack

Do you see that?  $1.  (Let the happy dance commence.) But I couldn’t go crazy.  Years ago when we still lived in our McMansion, I had a bad habit of biting off more than I could chew, or I guess I should say “buying more than I could plant”.  I would get excited buying 15 (full-price) plants, and by the time I got done planting 3 or 4 that afternoon, I would quit and promise to start again the next day.  But then I didn’t feel like it the next day, and the plants would sit on the back patio, and then I’d try to make sure I watered them, and then even that eventually stopped, until I was left with 10 sad little shriveled up brown twigs sitting in their pots of now-bone-dry soil.  (The pure wastefulness makes me shiver, even now.)

So I just bought 4 little plants at $1 each, plus a 50% off pygmy palm for $7.  Not bad!  I put the palm in my back seat. That was a mistake.  It tickled the back of my neck and top of my head the entire ride home.  At a stoplight, I decided to provide a visual.  Flared nostrils and all.  Next time I decide to transport a tickle-inducing plant home, it will be sitting on the opposite side of the car.  Lesson learned.

ferntickle

When I got home, I changed into my dirties, and got to work.  Here are my $1 plants in their new home.

planter

I went back to Lowe’s on Day #2, and what do you know…they had a whole new set of plants discounted down to a dollar, and another discounted palm.  Bought it, and bought it.  I did that for the next few days, and found something new on the discount rack nearly every single time.  Some are overstock, while others are just a little challenged.  Nothing that a little water and sunshine won’t fix.

flowers

 

 

palmandbertie

 

deckplanter

I picked up more plants, every day for 7 days straight, and now I’m rewarded with a yard full of plants!   This way was far better than my old method of buying a ton at once and then letting them die.  (Yes, that was sarcasm.) And getting them at such a steep discount?  That’s even better.  Landscaping your yard can be EXPENSIVE.  But if you know where to look, it doesn’t have to be.  Go to your local nursery/home improvement store/garden center and if you don’t see a discounted area, ask a salesperson if they have any plants that have been marked down.  Sometimes all you need to do is ASK.

GRAND TOTAL?  Over the course of 7 days, I bought (and planted!) 25 plants, and paid a total of $78.  Nearly all of them were purchased at a 50 – 75% discount.

And see those landscape boulders?  I got about 15 of them for FREE off of Craigslist.

Slowly…slowly…the plants will start to fill in.   It’s gone from a blank slate of dirt, to something that resembles a yard.  Remember when it looked like this?

thebeginning

Some day in the future, once the plants really start filling in, I’ll post an update with an official BEFORE and AFTER.  The time is going to fly by…soon it will feel like the backyard oasis I envisioned so long ago.

 

Moment of the Week: A Case of Mistaken Identity

By:

DisguiseEvery so often I like to look back on my week and see what things I accomplished, things I didn’t accomplish, humorous things that happened, etc.  So this is another “moment of the week”, a sort of brain-dump if you will, of things I think are worth sharing.  You’re welcome.

 

Normally my bagel Friday is rather uneventful.  I head to the Panera Bakery-Cafe near my house, and grab a coffee with a whole-grain bagel, toasted, topped with Reduced-Fat Blueberry Cream Cheese.  I find a quiet table and relax for a few moments, eating and checking my email.

But today was different.  I walk into Panera, and get in line.  As I wait, I start scanning the restaurant, reviewing the seating possibilities.  As my gaze starts to pull back, I realize this older gentleman sitting at a table is smiling at me.  I recognize him.  It’s a family friend, Chuck, that I’ve known since I was a kid.  I smile back and wave.

Eventually I get to the front of the line, place my order, and head to the coffee station.  As I’m getting my coffee just the way I like it (black, with a sprinkle of cinnamon and a splash of half-and-half, in case you’re wondering), I see Chuck smiling at me again, so I smile back, and give him a finger (not THAT finger) saying I’ll be over in a second.  He nods.  My pager buzzes, telling me my bagel is ready.  I go to the counter, grab the plate and head over to talk to Chuck.

As I get increasingly closer to his table, he starts grinning, and then I realize something.

IT’S. NOT. CHUCK. 

It’s a complete stranger.  I stood there at his table, holding my bagel, in painful silence.

Eventually some awkward conversation ensued.

 

Pseudo-Chuck: “Good morning.”

Me: “Good morning.”  [insert uncomfortable laugh]

Pseudo-Chuck: “Whatcha got there?”

Me: [another umcomfortable laugh] “Oh, just a bagel.”

Pseudo-Chuck: “Looks good.”

Me: “Yup. So, um, okay…I’m going to get started on my bagel then.  It’s really callin’ my name, so…” [yet another uncomfortable laugh]

Pseudo-Chuck: “Oh.  Okay.”

 

It was P-A-I-N-F-U-L.

(Side note:  I’ve done something similar only one other time that I can remember, years ago at my office.  I was heading down a long, narrow hallway towards the restroom when I saw a co-worker I knew coming towards me, at the other end.  I yelled out, “I DON’T THINK I’M GOING TO MAKE IT TO THE TOILET IN TIME!!!”, referencing an inside joke we had.  I didn’t get a response.  Turns out, as we got closer, it wasn’t my co-worker.  We passed each other in silence.  He’s probably still wondering, to this day, why I loudly announced my need to use the restroom.  Once again, awkward.)

 

Anyway, back to my story…

The conversation ended.  Pseudo-Chuck looked around, I looked around.  Doo-dee-doo.  As I shuffled away and found a table in the far, far back, one thing kept repeating in my head:  “Must. Wear. Glasses.”

My Experiment: I’m Declaring War on STRESS

By:

whack_a_moleUPDATE!  (Scroll down if you want to read the results of my experiment…)

Do you remember that arcade game called “Whack-a-Mole”?  Growing up, I loved it.  The mole pops up, you WHACK it.  Just as you’ve finished sinking that one back in its hole, another mole has popped up.  WHACK.  There’s no preparation, no time to think, it’s just one “WHACK!” after another for a solid frenzied minute.  The timer goes off, and you drop the cartoonishly large mallet in a display of exhaustion.

I’ve figured out that my life has started to feel like Whack-A-Mole.  I’m far too “reactive”.  I move from one issue to the next, whacking each crisis back into its hole.  And this reactive way of life causes STRESS…which in many cases is COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY.  Why do I live like this?  Day after day after day?  At it’s core, that constant daily stress makes me unhappy.

Some struggle with paying their bills on time.  Others put off school projects until the last minute.   Maybe you can’t seem to get dinner on the table before soccer practice so your family stuffs their faces in the car.  Me?  It’s the mad dash to get the kids off to school in the morning.

So, like I do with nearly every other problem I’ve come across, I analyzed it.

It seems logical that stress first thing in the morning sets a bad tone for the entire day.  And every morning that I get my kids ready and out the door to school, it’s a little bit chaotic.  Why?  How can I alleviate some or maybe (gasp!) ALL of the stress?

Here’s how my typical weekday morning looks:

The alarm clock goes off at 6:30am…I hit snooze twice until 6:48am…I finally pull myself out of bed…figure out my son’s clothes for school, crossing my fingers that there’s clean socks and underwear in his drawer…get breakfast on the table…make the kids lunches (x3)…get backpacks packed and zipped up…make sure at least an attempt occurs at toothbrushing…everyone in the car by 7:30am.

Making it in the car by 7:30am happens, but it’s a fly-around-the-house, nail-biting, non-stop-circus EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.  As soon as the school taxi arrives back home, I flop on to the sofa in an exhausted heap for a few minutes before logging on to work.

Now that I (and you) can take a wide-angle look at my morning, the problems and points where stress could be alleviated are glaringly obvious.

 

(1)  “I hit snooze twice”

If I’m hitting snooze, that means I’m not getting enough sleep.

START GOING TO BED BY 10PM

 

(2)  “Figure out my son’s outfit”

Why am I waiting until that morning to figure this out?  (More importantly, why isn’t HE figuring this out?  He’s in 5th grade. But that’s a battle for another day. Sigh.)

CHECK THE CLOTHING SITUATION THE EVENING BEFORE AT 7PM; RUN A LOAD OF LAUNDRY IF NECESSARY

 

(3)  “Get breakfast on the table”

This can’t be much more efficient, but with more time in the morning, my children will actually have time to CHEW their food, instead of inhaling it.

GET CEREAL / BAGELS / FRUIT OUT AND ON THE COUNTER THE NIGHT BEFORE AT 7PM

 

(4)  “Make the kids lunches”

I don’t know why I don’t do at least some of this the night before.  Well, actually I do know why.  It’s because the night before I’m getting the kids through their bedtime routines, and then I don’t feel like doing things like “lunch prep”.  So I browse other personal finance blogs. It’s my “me” time, okay? But this is going to change.

PACK ALL NON-PERISHABLE LUNCH ITEMS  THE NIGHT BEFORE AT 7PM

 

(5)  “Get backpacks pulled together”

This only takes me 5 or 6 minutes, but it’s just one more thing I can do the night before and get off the morning list.

PULL BACKPACKS TOGETHER THE NIGHT BEFORE AND SET THEM BY THE DOOR, AT 7PM

 

Now that I can see where the issues are, and most have to do with time management, I’m going to do a little experiment.  Let’s put on our lab coat and goggles and get started.

 

For one week, starting tomorrow, I’m going to follow the 5 recommendations I listed above.

 

This means at 7pm each weeknight I will pull together my son’s clothes for the next day, do a load of laundry if I need to, get the breakfast items out on the counter, pack the non-perishable lunch items, pull together the kids backpacks and set them by the door, and be IN BED by 10pm.

My hypothesis is that getting to bed earlier will equate to more sleep at night, causing me to actually get up when my alarm goes off at 6:30am, instead of hitting snooze.  At that point, I’ll already gain 18 minutes of time that I was previously snoozing away.  That, along with the other time-saving measures, should provide for a relaxing morning routine.

The truth is, my family deserves the best from me.  And if I’m spending my mornings yelling, “Where’s your left shoe?” from the back of the house, or giving a death stare when my son tells me he’s left his backpack at home, that’s not the mother I want them to remember when I pull up to the school and drop them at the curb.  That’s not the mother I want them to remember when they’re waving goodbye as they head off to college.

I’ve only got so many years left in this stage of life; where I get to help them with their homework and hear about their day at the dinner table each night. Soon enough they’ll be gone and starting a new chapter in their own book.  So here’s to making a life change for the better.  Managing a part of my life that causes me to be a person I’m not proud of.

I already have a suspicion that by the end of this week, I’m going to feel FANTASTIC.

 

*************************************

UPDATE!   Tuesday May 6th

Monday morning went well.  I didn’t snooze my alarm, and the morning was calm.  I felt like June Cleaver.   But…last night I couldn’t fall asleep.  I was in bed at 9:50pm, and I laid there tossing and turning until after 11pm.  Ugh.  The longer I’m awake, the more frustrated I become, and the more frustrated I become, the longer I’m awake.  So I ended up using BOTH snoozes this morning.  I know, right?!?  But, here’s the awesome thing.  Because I had put so many other time-saving measures in place, we still had a leisurely morning and got off to school beautifully.

I’m hoping that as the week goes on, my brain will start to adjust towards going to sleep earlier, so I don’t have trouble every night. We’ll see…

 

ANOTHER UPDATE!   Friday May 9th

What a difference a week makes.  Last night I fell asleep at 9:20pm and got a full night’s rest.  I’m not exaggerating when I say that managing just that one stressful area of my life, made a difference in the way I felt each day.  I’m no longer starting my day in a stressful panic.  Instead it was a calm, peaceful environment,  moving from one task to the next, until everyone was ready for school, with time to spare.  Which seemed to set the tone for the entire day. I think I’ll even start playing classical music; it would serve as a fitting backdrop to our now-pleasurable mornings.

This life change will definitely be integrated into my daily routine, and become my new normal.  It’s almost sad when I look back and realize how comfortably miserable I was.  Change is good.

*************************************

 

Do you have anything that causes stress?  Does it bring out the less-desirable sides of you?   What can you do to change it?

mySHINYnickels.com…My First 60 Days as a Blogger

By:

It’s been 60 days since I started this blog.   There were moments of elation, confidence and liberation mixed and mingled with moments of self-doubt, discouragement and vulnerability.  I realize how dramatic that sounds, but in no way was I prepared for the emotions that resulted from writing in a public forum like this.  One thing I’ve already learned is that when you put yourself out there for anyone and everyone to see, it causes a level of introspection like I’ve never experienced in my 35 years of existence.

Who am I?  Is anyone interested in what I have to say?  What is my role in the blogosphere?  Will people read?  Will they like me?  Do I sound arrogant/off-putting/whiny?  The incessant inner monologue almost consumed me at times.

I played with the blogging idea for years before actually committing to it 60 days ago.  I wasn’t sure that I had much to say, but then it struck me.  I have a  passion and I have a story.   We started living smarter, demolished our debt, and started saving…which led to really LIVING.  I soon realized that over the course of our financial journey, I had gathered so much good information, it wasn’t right to keep it to myself any longer.   I knew we weren’t the only ones living a “financed life”.    From behind the wheel of a financed car, we drove to our mortgaged-to-the-hilt house, all while wearing clothes we probably bought on credit.

We couldn’t be the only ones, could we?  And having come out the other side with a newly found financial security, and a quality of life never before experienced, it was time to share.  But…within a few minutes of purchasing www.mySHINYnickels.com, I was already thinking…”I’m committed now. What have I done?”

But I decided to just…start.   I began writing.  And as the weeks went by, I saw my readership slowly increase.   As of this moment, I’ve had over 6,000 page views across 48 different countries.  What?!?  For a little newborn blogger like me, those numbers surpass my mind’s comprehension.  I’ve had many people contact me through the site…asking questions, offering words of support and some telling me that I helped light the fire to get their finances on track.  Most are complete strangers, who, through one channel or another, found my blog.

No one knows where this will go, or what will come of it, but I’ve already reaped more benefits than I imagined.  Thanks for joining me.

 

P.S.  Don’t forget…if you want to be one of the first to know about a new post, enter your email in the subscription box on the left-hand side.  You’ll never be spammed.  Pinky swear.

 

 

 

 

 

DIY Project: The Backyard Deck

By:

You already know we love DIY.  Getting in the trenches…hands muddy, clothes dusty, hair streaked in paint, a few bloody battle scars thrown in.  When you create something special with your own hands, it just feels different.   But it doesn’t mean we haven’t had our challenges.  Some projects are weekenders, some are months long that should have been weekenders, and some are years long that should have taken a few months.  We’re not always fast, but we always get there.

As springtime weather is starting to arrive here in Central California, I looked out at our pretty little backyard and smiled…realizing it will soon be time for cookouts and cool evenings out in the hammock.  But it wasn’t always that way.  Oh, no.

If you’ve read my post from last month, Don’t Be Afraid to Make a Big Change, you know that we downsized to the smaller house we’re in now.  And went from this backyard…

Our $25,000 contractor-completed backyard at the old house…nice, but aye, aye, aye that’s a lot of cash.

to something that looked like this:

Mr.Nickels and I were responsible for quite a few self-made dust storms that summer.

 

Fast forward to the summer of 2012.  A year and a half had passed since we downsized.  My husband and I were standing outside, looking out at the barren wasteland that we called our backyard.  At one time it had an actual lawn-like green-ness going on, but our renter wasn’t always good about yard care, so by the time we had moved in, it was pretty much a blank, weedy, slate.

So the planning began.  We knew we wanted something simple…some sort of area for entertaining, and I wanted at least a small lawn with some plants and trees.  I described what I was envisioning to my husband…a small platform deck, maybe 15 feet by 15 feet.  Enough to fit a large table and chairs, plus some.  This is the sketch my husband quickly scribbled out onto a piece of paper.

I should have insisted he sign this masterpiece

 

With at least an ‘idea’ of what we wanted, we started prepping the dirt. We rented a rototiller and a trencher, and he went to town.  Turned all the soil over, and started making all of the trenches for the sprinkler system that would eventually be going in.  Here he is, trenching away…

 

We laid the sprinkler pipes, filled in the trenches, and threw out some grass seed.  While sun and water did their thing to get the grass going, we started on the biggest piece. The deck.  At the time, we’d never built a deck or any other major carpentry project, in fact.  But armed with motivation and a dash of excitement, we jumped in with both feet.  My husband starting reading ‘how-to-build-a-deck’ books, took some measurements, and for the most part, I just stood back.  There wasn’t a whole lot I could do at the time.  Then we started digging what looked like large post holes, and they were REALLY far apart.  I remember thinking, “I don’t know what the heck we’re doing, but alrighty…”  

 

Next he was pouring concrete piers.  What is he doing now???  Are we building a skyscraper or a backyard deck?  Ok, ok…I’ll just roll with it.

The next afternoon, he sent me a text that read, “Go check out the backyard.”   Um, okay.  I went outside, looked around for a bit, and then I saw it.  He had carved our initials into the surface of one of the concrete piers the evening before.  I got a big ‘ol goofy smile on my face.  We’re cheesy and lovey-dovey like that, okay?  So shoot us.  Plus, I like the idea of someone years from now uncovering it.  Like a secret message buried in the bowels of our deck.

 

headerbeams

Pretty soon the grass was growing, but to help it along we found some dying-but-seriously-discounted sod from a local retailer, and laid it down.  It was originally $4 a roll, and we offered a buck.  They accepted, and we carted 30 rolls home.  Worked like a charm, and came back to life without a hitch.  But the deck was waiting for us…it was time to install the post supports and the main girders.  You can see four un-cut posts in the background; those would eventually be the supports for our pergola.  Our dog Piggy was lead supervisor on the project.  But she proved unhelpful; all she did was pant a lot and poop in our construction zone.  We’ll be renegotiating her contract.

 

deck6

Things were moving fast now.  After the girders were installed, it was time for the joists, the boards that support the deck surface.  I know it appears that I’m not doing any work, since Mr. Nickels is in all the pictures, but I swear I was out there with him the entire time; helping to trim boards, setting joist hangers and holding/retrieving various tools like a well-trained dental assistant.  It became a highly-synchronized process, with only a few curse words thrown in, usually when a hammer would miss its intended target.

 

deck7

Now you can see the deck starting to take shape.  And this was about the time I realized that my husband had taken things up a notch.  The deck was far more ENORMOUS than I ever pictured in my head, and he had created a second level (upper right corner).   When this man does something, he is ALL IN.  And I find it pretty hot when he’s got a power tool in his hand.

 

deck8

Here it is at that same stage, from the other direction.  Boy, the lawn was going crazy by then.  We did mow it.  Eventually.

 

deck9

With all the joists hung, it was time to lay the surface boards.  This is when it started getting exciting.  The evening before this was taken, we had ended our workday with only 10 or so surface boards on. But I took a deck chair, set it up there, and marveled at how far it had come.  Mr. Nickels joined me and we talked and talked into the night until we could no longer see our hands in front of our face.

 

deck10

What a difference a day makes.  We finished all of the surface boards, got up the next day, and started securing the beams for the pergola.  I pranced around the deck many times that day.  I couldn’t believe how it was coming together.

 

deck11

Next we built a railing around the upper level, and capped the posts off with copper tops.  I’m an impatient person by nature, so I had the patio furniture and umbrella up there before we were even done.

 

We built some steps leading up to the deck, and I set a couple of potted plants on each side to make it pretty until we could get the skirting around the sides of the deck completed (to cover up the underlying posts/concrete piers).

 

deckfinished

We finished building out the pergola, hung bright red curtains,  and set up our hammock.   It’s still a work in progress, as we get another set of steps on this side built, and planter boxes around the perimeter.  But we’re already enjoying it.  Many nights we’ve spent out here with family and friends.  Eventually the plants and trees will grow and fill in, and the backyard will evolve into a green, leafy paradise.

I can’t imagine what it would have cost to have a contractor come and build this for us.  Our best guess?  Maybe about $8,000 or so?  But of course we didn’t pay that ridiculous amount.  We paid: a little sweat + a little blood + $1,600 in materials.  We gained:  a sweet deck, a ton of carpentry experience and quality time.

I think back to that little pencil sketch my husband made, and I laugh.  I should have known that if I ask for a basic patio, we’d end up with a multi-level 600 square foot party deck.  And I’m not complaining one bit.

 

 

**********************************************************

Now for one last thing, just so I can sleep a little better tonight…

Disclaimer / Legal Mumbo-Jumbo:

DIY projects, such as those mentioned above, are performed at your own risk.

As with any do-it-yourself/DIY project, unfamiliarity with the tools and process can be dangerous. All DIY-related posts should be construed as theoretical advice and aesthetic inspiration. Improper use of tools could result in damage to your property or serious bodily injuries. MYSHINYNICKELS.com is not liable for any damage or injury resulting from the DIY projects listed or referenced.